withtheoldbreed | d-day + 52 ✯ video

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d-day + 52 ✯ video

[It's relatively early in the morning when Sledge clicks on his video feed, and he looks tired, maybe even exhausted. It's also obvious he's not in his own cabin - the room behind him looks more like a shack, and although it might not be as clear, he's sitting on the floor, half leaning against the legs of a cot. One of Snafu's arms is visible, hanging limply off the side of the cot like he's just asleep.]

... Snafu's in a coma. [The word sits uncomfortably in his mouth, and it kind of shows in his face. He's read about barge comas obviously, thanks to Chromie's welcome packet, but it's one thing to read about it, another to try shaking your buddy awake and not be able to, no matter how hard you try.

He takes a breath and steels himself, trying to push it back and get what needs to get done, done.

(Except his eyes still look pretty dead, but that's not really anything new.)]

I'm gonna need a hand getting him to the infirmary.

[Private to Kieren]

I thought it'd be better than just leavin' him here. [It's what the pamphlet suggested, anyway, and he sort of feels more comfortable leaving his friend with people who can monitor him and make sure he doesn't get worse (if that's even possible?), but he still sounds uncertain. Like maybe this - making decisions about his friend's well being - is overstepping.

Which is weird to think about someone you've pretty much been physically stuck with for over a month, but here we are.]

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We're in the infirmary. [And while his voice still sounds kind of hollow and weird, he does manage to force something like humor and life into the second part of what he says.] Don't think we're goin' anywhere.

[So Kieren can come up whenever, basically. 8(]

Yeah. [His heart drops into his stomach.] Yeah, okay.

[He doesn't know what to say beyond that, so he just hangs up and comes to the infirmary. His footfalls feel astonishingly heavy, like his limbs are deader than usual; his face doesn't get drawn anymore, but he just looks tired, heavy-hearted, as though he doesn't know what to do.]

[Which is fair enough: he has no idea. What does a warden do without his inmate?]

[Poking his head into the infirmary, he spots Gene quickly enough, waves and comes in.] All right?

[It's a stupid question, but he doesn't know what else to ask.]

[Gene's sitting in a chair next to the bed Captain Rogers had put Snafu in, and while he doesn't exactly look happier or pleased when he makes eye contact with the other warden, he does perk up a little bit. Or, at least, he's a little more alert as he considers the question, and maybe it's something of a weird relief to see that Kieren looks tired and worried, too.

No, Gene's not alright, but the reason he's not is kind of stupid because Snaf's going to be fine, the nightmare he'd had was just that - a nightmare - and it's fucking stupid to be feeling torn up inside about any of it. Right? Nothing he can do about it, anyway.

So he lies.]

Fine. [He scrubs a hand over his eyes, trying to wake himself up.] Thanks for coming.

Yeah. Yeah, of course.

[He forces out a tired laugh.]

Not as though I have anywhere else to be right now, right? Just got to stick with my inmate.

[Who's currently lying in a coma on the bed, unresponsive to anything at all for who knows how long. Kieren sits in the nearest chair, stares at Snafu for a long moment, and then just . . . buries his head in his hands.]

[He can't do this.]

[Gene doesn't say anything else - what can he say? - looking back at Snafu and trying not to think too hard about the nightmare, how badly panicked it had left him, how it was worse to see Snaf unconscious and unmoving right after, but the flash of motion from the other warden catches his attention, and he frowns, worried.

(It makes him think about Jay, and the thought doesn't exactly help him feel any less homesick and strange. Strange, too, to be anything close to homesick for Peleliu.)]

Kieren?

I'm just--

[--he says into his hands, and then sits up and pushes his hair back away from his face, all one fluid gesture of despair and futility.]

Worried about him. I'm worried - but I know, comas happen all the time, people come back from them, it's nothing, it's probably nothing.

[It's got to be nothing. It probably won't even last long. Right? He looks sideways at Gene, helpless.]

[Gene honestly doesn't know how to help. He's nervous and unhappy about it, too, and he's just as new at this as the other guy is, so he doesn't know what to say.

Well, except maybe one thing.]

You can't dwell on it, Kieren. [It comes out a little like a tired, defeated sigh.] He'll be okay.

[Which would likely sound more convincing if Gene sounded anything close to believing that this is okay himself, but. He's trying?]

Right. I know. I know. He'll be okay. It'll be fine.

[He runs his hands through his hair one more time, then looks to Gene. Really looks at him, at the bags under his eyes, at the way he's sitting.]

[Something isn't right here.]

Gene. Not trying to be rude. But you look like shit.

[Gene barks out a noise that sounds more or less like a soft laugh, and one corner of his mouth rises in a wry, playfully offended smile.] Thanks.

[He's vaguely tempted to say that he's not sure if he's supposed to be taking that as a compliment or not, coming from Kieren, considering how the other guy looks, but he doesn't know him well enough to tease like that, and he's not sure if the guy'd get upset about it or not. He's never had to seriously think about what might hurt a zombie's feelings before.

But yeah. He knows.]

Edited (Fusses!!) 2015-01-07 13:00 (UTC)

[He smiles, too, in a tired kind of way. Just as wry, like he knows what Gene is thinking.]

Yeah. Welcome.

You been sleeping?

Sometimes. [While his smile stays kind of wry, he looks away to look at Snafu again, reluctant to admit just how much the answer should probably be "not really". He's not ashamed of how badly thing have been affecting him, exactly, because he knows it tears up everyone, but it's still embarrassing to admit to, or explain, especially to someone he doesn't know too well yet.]

I'm alright. [They're not really in a situation where he needs to be totally alert 100% of the time, so he can probably afford to be a little less than fully rested, anyway.]

[Kieren's lips twist. He doesn't believe it, not quite, but he also doesn't feel like he knows Gene well enough to call him on his bullshit. So he looks to Snafu, too. It's funny; when he's up, Snafu seems thus far to be mainly a source of conflict between the two of them, albeit minor conflict. But when he's asleep, he's a safe place to look, a safe place to lodge their concern.]

[He's their common thread, Kieren supposes. It means a lot.]

When I used to be-- when I was sick. Sometimes I wouldn't sleep for days. It got really bad.

[Gene glances back at Kieren when he continues, brow furrowing slightly in something that looks more like concern than anything else. Or confusion. Like he's not entirely certain where the other guy's going with this.]

What helped?

[He twists his lip in sort of a miserable half-smile.]

Never found anything good. Just getting up and doing something else for a while, sometimes, but mostly I just had to wait for everything to seem - less. And it didn't always.

Sounds familiar. [There's still something sort of teasing in his voice, but it's hollow, too. Silence stretches between them for a moment or two before Gene lets out a heavy sigh, frustrated or tired or something else.

(It really is easier to look at Snaf when he continues, because this feels weird to say - admit to - looking someone in the eye.)]

I didn't dream as much over there. Guess I was too tired.

Yeah. Makes sense.

[He can't imagine being that tired, knows he's privileged not to know that level of exhaustion. He wishes he could do more than empathize, but doesn't know how to explain to Gene the heavy tiredness he used to feel, like none of his limbs could possibly lift, like his limbs were made of lead.]

[It's not comparable, anyway. It's not the same.]

But here you can rest. So here you have nightmares.

[He can imagine.]

Yeah. [Under different circumstances, maybe he wouldn't have admitted to it. Part of him even feels like he wants to just explain what he'd been dreaming about, like maybe saying it out loud would make it easier for him to cope with it, but maybe it wouldn't. Maybe he's just too tired to be thinking it through like he should.

Gene rubs his hands over his face, trying to wake himself up.]

After I woke up and couldn't get him to, didn't feel like there was much point in tryin' to fall back asleep.

So you're just gonna stay awake until he comes back?

[Assuming he does. Kieren has decided to ferociously assume that, because the alternative is too terrible; he simply can't handle it as a possibility.]

No. [That surprised a chuckle out of him, and he shoots Kieren a look that's still tired, but amused.] I'll sleep in a while. Just needed to get my bearing's back a little.

[Now that the dream's a little more faded around the edges, it's easier to deal with this. Easier, not really better, because it's still kind of beyond shitty, and very strange.

One corner of his mouth flicks up in a sort of chagrined smile.] I didn't want to be botherin' anyone for help in the middle of the night, either.

[Kieren smiles back, in a tired way. It's an odd thing, but one of the last vestiges of humanity and one of the first they recovered was a need to sleep. It used to be that in the treatment center he'd sleep for ten or twelve hours a day - more, at first, as his brain rebuilt itself.]

[He knows the importance of rest. But he doesn't know how to help Gene get it, except--]

You can always ask me. You know?

I do now. [Which again, could almost be teasing, almost like the person he used to be before he hit the beach, before the guy in front of him on the LVT had been shot and fallen on him, getting his blood all over Gene as he bled out and someone hustled Sledge up and over the side.

(He likes Kieren. He's not sure how he feels about him being Snafu's warden, but he likes him. Even if it's strange, to be looking at someone who still almost looks like a corpse, and Gene's sort of aware that maybe it's only manageable because he looks nothing like the decaying bodies on Peleliu.)

Gene's quiet for a moment, worrying vaguely over what to say next, looking back at his sleeping friend.]

Thanks. I know he's- [Weird, horrible, gross, kind of broken and dissociated and Kieren has to know about what Snaf's done if Gene knows half of what he does about Jimmy thanks to the file.] Asiatic, we'd call it. Weird. But I don't really want to think about goin' through whatever's next without him.

[So the fact that he has a warden who cares enough to be here is hopefully a good thing. Maybe he won't have to figure out how to get through the rest of the war without Ack Ack, Hillbilly and Snaf.]

Edited 2015-01-19 21:36 (UTC)

[Kieren would say fucked up. In fact he blanches a little, to the extent that he can - Asiatic - but lets it slide, this time. Gene isn't his warden. He isn't even a hundred percent sure that Gene is his friend. Maybe if he was more secure he'd take friendship for granted, but he can't, not anymore.]

[He nods, anyway.]

You won't have to. He's not - I don't know what he is, exactly, but he's not hopeless. I wouldn't be sitting here if he was.

[Part of the point, after all, is Amy. Even if he didn't care about Snafu even a little bit, he'd have to have some kind of hope, for Amy.]

I think I'm starting to see what you see in him. Even if he does say some awful things.

[Well, that goes without saying when you choose to identify as "Snafu", doesn't it?

Gene isn't really sure of what to make of Kieren's reaction - that's just what they call people who've been in the Pacific too long, who act weird and are kind of fucked up, but not badly enough to need to be evacuated or sent to Banika for help - so he half brushes it aside as hope flares cautiously when the other warden says he thinks they'll be okay.

... But then Kieren says that, and Gene grimaces slightly.]

Sorry. [It's not like he has control over it, and it's not like he's really got control over Snaf's behavior, but. He still feels responsible, somehow.]

Edited 2015-01-19 21:56 (UTC)

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